No. 75
Knee deep in the Old Testament and still making sourdough waffles
We went to the birthday party of a dear friend this week and I found this strawberry wrapping paper at Home Goods and thought it was so pretty! It makes me so excited for warmer weather and having hopefully actual strawberries in the garden soon.
Something I studied in the Bible:
I was knee deep in 1 Samuel 13-14 this week because there was so much going on but I think if I was going to give a summary phrase for them it would be: the pseudo spirituality of legalism vs. bold trust in the Lord. 1 Samuel 13 starts with Saul on the verge of battle, with him and his men gripped by fear (v. 7) and impatiently waiting for Samuel to appear as he had promised to do after 7 days (1 Sam. 10:8). When Samuel doesn’t immediately appear, Saul calls for the offerings to be brought to him, and just as he finishes the offering Samuel appears and asks him “what have you done?” Saul answers that Samuel did not appear when he promised to and he thought to himself that the men were deserting him and he had not sought the Lord’s favor so he forced himself to make the offering in his place. Samuel condemns his foolishness and tells Saul that because of this his kingdom has been appointed to another and will not endure.
On surface level, what Saul did might not seem that bad. It sounds very explainable and even spiritual to seek the Lord’s favor. On a deeper level though you can see the pride that ultimately destroyed Saul just seeping through the seams. He oversteps from his position as king to priest to rule as a one-man show the first chance he gets, ignoring the limits that God placed on who had what role. Saul tried to take things into his own hands out of both pride and fear and it cost him greatly. His verbiage in saying that he “forced himself” to perform the sacrifice was just a pretty way of saying that he felt justified in sinning and didn’t see it as a problem. There is no repentance, just excuses.
1 Samuel 14 starts with Jonathan going to the Philistine garrison with his armor bearer to cross over and that perhaps the Lord will be with them because the Lord can save as much with many as he can with few. As they get closer, Jonathan puts a sign forth as a test for if the Lord is with them and they should engage or stay put. When they see the sign that the Lord is with them, Jonathan boldly tells his armor bearer to go forth with him because the Lord has handed them the Philistines and the two of them strike down about 20 men in their first assault and send the Philistine camp into a terror as the earth begins to shake and the terror of the Lord comes on them. When Saul hears of this, he begins a roll call and discovers that Jonathan is gone and has started the attack. Saul begins to call for a priest but seeing the panic intensify he halts it and they go into battle and the Lord saves Israel.
This display of bold faith and the provision of God should have been what is remembered of this, but the next verses show that as they were heading into battle, Saul puts the men under an oath saying that no one must eat until he has had his vengeance on his enemies or they will be cursed, so none of the men ate out of fear. Saul is trying here to reclaim credit for the victory that is happening, foolishly thinking that greatness would only happen through him. That he says “my vengeance” show his pride and whose glory he is after. He pronounces a curse, something he does not have the spiritual authority to do as king, and his judgement is extreme on those who break his oath. Saul’s behavior here should serve as a warning against legalism in deciding what is ‘sin’ or cursed for others that we don’t have the authority to declare. As one commentator wrote on this chapter, those who are entrapped by sin often judge the sin of others with more harshness out of their own guilt and condemnation.
Jonathan is already in battle and does not hear this oath and as they are in the forests that have honey combs dripping around them, he dips his staff into one and eats and is greatly refreshed. The troops around him inform him of the oath and Jonathan says that his father is bringing trouble on them and had the men eaten they would have done better in battle. Saul’s oath made the troops weak and distracted, only able to see the oath and not God’s provision in the victory or in the sustenance he was offering in the honey flowing around them and this distraction made them unable to receive what was right there in front of them. His oath put them in distress because it was a fast about him and not the Lord. I can’t help but think here how careful we must be not to put those around us in distress by trying to do things the Lord hasn’t called us to just to prove a point of how good or ‘holy’ we are.
The troops end up rushing to plunder in their exhaustion, falling into sin and eating meat with blood still in it. It begs a question of self examination: do we lead others into sin because of our harsh or rash judgements causing them to act in harsh or rash ways because of the weight of a burden they shouldn’t have to carry? Legalism does not ever keep us from sin or closer to being holy, it only provokes rebellion or leads into pride over how much better you keep the ‘rules’. Seeing their sin caused by his foolish oath should’ve stopped Saul’s pride but instead he gains a second wind and tries to get the troops to continue plundering through the night. The priests tell Saul to approach God and ask, but the Lord doesn’t answer Saul. In his impatience yet again, Saul makes a rash decision and digs his heels in once more asking for lots to be cast on who is responsible for the sin that day. Saul is so sure of his own innocence and full of pride in his lineage that he rashly again puts a foolish oath saying that whoever is responsible will die, even if it is Jonathan.
Now the men knew that Jonathan had eaten but not one came forward with that information. Saul clearly blames the troops and they are terrified. In his self assured pride he places himself and Jonathan on one side, and the troops on the other and the lot falls to himself and Jonathan. Again he does not see himself as at fault and calls for it to be cast between himself and Jonathan. When the lot falls to Jonathan, instead of admitting the foolishness of his pride in making rash oaths, Saul doubles down and says Jonathan must die. Jonathan admits to his ‘sin’ and says he is ready to die for it, clearly repentant towards the Lord even for his sin done unknowingly. The troops however step in at that point and save Jonathan from Saul’s pride and refusal to admit fault saying that God’s approval of Jonathan was clear in battle.
Saul’s pride here worked so hard to appear good and holy on surface level, using phrases and oaths to sound like God was on his side, but it is Jonathan who is genuine in giving glory to the Lord and repenting from sin even when it is unintentional and caused because of his own father, that is living rightly before the Lord. A reminder that genuine faith is not just surface level but when tested and examined, comes out steadfast. Our pastor gave a great sermon yesterday on 2 Corinthians 13 that tells us to test and examine ourselves on whether our faith is real. Saul’s faith failed him because it ran out when his pride or impatience God the better of him and he was more interested in the appearance of holiness and power rather than actual holiness.
A way I saw the goodness of God:
This week was kind of a mixed bag of emotional highs and lows. There was a funeral for someone in our extended family and it had us reflecting a lot on the ways God provides and carries us through, and how we can better serve and love those around us with the time we do have. God also gave me so many moments of celebration and praise this week as I received a few texts from friends who shared how God had answered prayers we had prayed together. We also got together to celebrate a dear friend and it always amazes me how even in spaces that don’t seem the place for moments of faith building, God weaves in the opportunities for us to testify of his goodness. I had such a good conversation with a friend at this party about what the Lord has been doing in each of our lives lately and it just made me so thankful for people who are able to have these conversations anywhere and everywhere. Ironically it was also that morning that I had a similar conversation with a different friend as we were watching our kids swim at the pool in our gym about how God is just so prevalent in everything when we let him be part of everything. God has been so good to me, to my family, to my extended family, to my church family. It is evident everywhere I look.
A recipe I made:
With everything going on this week our meals were pretty similar to the last few weeks. I made the Mexican ground beef skillet again that lasted a few days and more sourdough discard waffles. We also did mashed potatoes and some chicken apple and gouda sausages in the oven one day for a quick easy dinner. Best thing I ate this week was probably the chicken marsala that was served at the birthday party we went to and I’m going to try to find a good recipe for that soon (unless anyone has a suggestion they want to leave in the comments!).
Recommendations:
I purchased this ‘History as They Saw It’ coffee table book as a gift for a friend this week and it’s such a cool one to look through. My husband saw it and mentioned that he was hoping to look through it because he thought it was for us and I do want to get one for our house as well.
I always look forward to when they bring out the spring scents from Mrs. Meyers and this new hydrangea scent is my new favorite. It’s a light floral that isn’t super overpowering.
It was so nice outside Saturday afternoon and our kids pulled out the bubble basket to play with the neighbors kids and had such a great time. I bought a set like this last year or two years ago I think with a mix of the large and some smaller wands and the big ones are always so impressive! The kids have made some beachball sized bubbles with it before.
Speaking of bubbles, if your kids are still at the age to play with those, do yourself a favor and buy a gallon of bubble solution to last you through the spring/summer. I always refill the bubble wands they have and this has enough that I can pour it into the giant trays for the big wand shapes without worrying about running out if one of the kids knocks it over and spills some.
Something that brought me joy:
We went to see the King of Kings movie this weekend in the theater with the kids (honestly kind of meh about it, felt like it was just ok but not as captivating or memorable as other Christian movies out there for kids) and they got a bit restless near the end and so did the kid next to us. What got me though it though was the mom next to us kept whisper-threatening her kid, who was about 8 or 9, to sit still and at one point she is trying to use every last ounce of Christian behavior she has in her and she loudly hisses at him “WOULD YOU STOP MOVING AND WATCH? JESUS IS GOING TO DIE SOON AND IT’S GOING TO BE SAD!” I had to cover my mouth immediately to keep from bursting into laughter. Moms will say the oddest things sometimes when we are upset and hearing it from another mom phrased like that was so unintentionally funny.